The Human Response to Shock and Loss

Moments in the Flow...Finding Peace with Bach Flowers and Essential Oils

Nov 09, 2024

Hello Again,

Most people are aware of current events that have caused widespread distress. In the US, unimaginable hurricanes took place with devastating effects that will not be easily overcome. Some here have also been traumatized by the result of a Presidential election that appears to threaten choices and freedoms.

Unrest, destruction, and danger are being experienced in many places around the world. No matter how much we strive to be positive, enlightened, and in a state of balance and peace, we are still humans on a 3D earth and events can affect us, upsetting equilibrium.

All of this has created a time when many are collectively experiencing trauma and grief. The events may have come along with other stress and loss in our personal lives, too.

Grief

For those of you who haven’t seen it, I shared a post on Facebook a few days ago that really rang a bell for many people who are reeling from the results of the US Presidential Election. Seeing a natural reaction of grief, other ‘helpful’ people quickly suggested that they put this aside and concentrate on purely positive ideas.

I think the grief of others often makes people uncomfortable and this ‘fix it’ is a typical response in that situation. That, and literally disappearing for a while.

While I am a believer in holding high frequency and positive vision, I also know that there are times in life when grief is a natural response to shock and loss. Associated with the lung and large intestine flows in Jin Shin Jyutsu, the energy of grief should not be blocked, buried or stifled. If it remains without an outlet it puts stones in the path of the healthy flow. There can and probably will be future ramifications in the body.

(The image below relates to a simple finger practice for the emotions related to the organ flows. The Touch of Healing gives entry-level information about how you can do self-help. and the link is to their website where you can learn more about the work and classes.)

While I’m not suggesting we stay with grief for long periods of time, I know that everyone has their own process to go through and their own timeline. In my own moments of loss, I found that honoring this natural response, letting myself cry and acknowledge my pain, helps the grief dissipate.

And I also know that I don’t have to prove my ‘spiritual status’ by giving grief a bypass.

Thanks to a pioneer in this field, Elizabeth Kubler Ross, we know that grief has predictable and easily recognizable stages. Her groundbreaking book, On Death and Dying, was later followed by another, On Grief and Grieving.

The Five Stages

· The usual process of grief begins with Denial. “This can’t be/isn’t happening”

· After denying, there is Anger, which may be specifically directed at the event or a general agitation

· When the Anger doesn’t achieve a new result there is an attempt to do so by Bargaining, which can be directed at a ‘higher power’ in a promise of some better behavior if this situation goes away.

· After Bargaining fails, Depression sets in.

· When that is overcome, we arrive at Acceptance.

The is no set time for each of the responses to complete. And philosophy also tells us ‘That which we resist, persists.’ Persistance can be seen if we resist the natural response of these feelings and emotions.

The judgement of others as we go through this process can cause the added complications of self-doubt and self-blame. But I believe we have not failed ourselves or anyone else by having these natural human feelings.

Help with the process

After the initial, instinctive response takes place, there comes a time when I can observe myself as being in stages of Shock and Grief. The first thing I think of is helping myself find some peace by making a Bach Flower Remedy.

An article I posted during June, Astrology and Bach Flowers, has an introduction to Dr. Bach and aspects of this healing method. More information can be found on my website. I do teach classes about this gentle healing art and give consultations to help clients select the flowers needed for a specific situation, or as a ‘constitutional’ remedy that relates to tendencies that can be seen through the astrological birth chart.

In my desire for brevity here, I will suggest you read the post and contact me if you would like a class or consultation. For this post I will list some of the Bach Flowers that can help restore a sense of peace during stages of grief.

BACH FLOWER REMEDIES

Here are some of the Remedies you might use for stages of grief. You can choose up to 6 Remedies and put 6 drops of each into a small (8 0z) bottle of spring water. This you would sip occasionally during the day, and especially if the symptom arises. A small amount can also be poured into a drink you sip, like tea or coffee. Frequency of application is the key, not quantity, as it is with regular allopathic medicines. How often, not how much.

· Rescue Remedy the most well-known Bach Flower Remedy, this is a blend of five different flowers that alleviate the symptoms of a traumatic event, panic attack, or severe disorientation. If you make a blend to include more remedies, this will count as one.

· Star of Bethlehem is an ingredient in Rescue Remedy, this flower can be used alone for Shock and Trauma.

· Rock Rose is another ingredient of Rescue Remedy. It is for extreme fear, or terror.

· Mimulus is for fear of known things, like flying, spiders, and all known fears of the world.

· Holly is for intense feelings: anger, hatred, suspicion, jealousy, revenge

· Gentian is for the difficulty dealing with an apparent setback…lack of faith

· Gorse is for feelings of hopelessness. Allowing help while believing it will not work.

· Willow is for feelings of resentment and consequent withdrawal from situations or relationships.

Bach Flower Remedies can be found online and may be carried in a local health food store.

ESSENTIAL OILS

Another of my regular methods for easing difficult mental and emotional moments is making a blend of Essential Oils. The blend can be used in a diffuser (electronic or air spray) or diluted into a carrier oil (like fractionated coconut) and applied to the skin. In an ounce of carrier oil, you can have 7 to 10 drops total.

Essential Oils have both physiological effects and subtle effects on mind and emotions. Subtle effects are what we look for when blending for Grief. Doing may also have a positive effect on discomfort in the body.

And important thing to know is that prices for essential oils can vary from affordable to way above the budget line. When you are using them on the body, you can find reputable companies who offer high quality essential oils, prediluted in carrier oil. I will give you links in the information below with suggestions for that purpose.

A Blend to Ease Grief

· Rose is a primary essence for the heart center. The idea of romantic love is carried by the rose, but there is also a soft, nurturing quality that is particularly useful for grief and loss. A little goes a long way, so only a drop or two might be needed in the 1 oz blend. It is less frequently found in diffusion blends. This is an expensive essential oil and it is wise to buy prediluted. In this form it can be easily absorbed by the carrier for the other essences.

· Melissa is another expensive but effective essence for grief. The aroma is lemon-like and the common name for the plant is Lemon Balm. Another suggestion for buying prediluted.

· Sweet Marjoram is affordable and provides relief from tension and pain while it gives the added benefit of relaxing sleep. Because this is an herb, you may wish to buy the organic form.

· Bergamot is another affordable heart chakra essence that is from the peel of a citrus fruit. It brings courage and a sunny feeling that opens us up to give and receive love. When using in dilution on the skin, it is important to buy the FCF, Bergapten free version. The one in the link is also organic. *Simple extraction from the peel that contains bergapten can cause photosensitivity, phototoxic response that can manifest as a serious rash.

· Fir, Siberian relates to the lungs and the aroma is cleansing and uplifting, encouraging deeper breathing. This organic wildcrafted Fir essential oil is affordable in larger amounts. It can be diffused alone or with other essences, especially Sweet Orange, for an uplifting and protective winter seasonal blend.

(Please note, the companies in the links are ones I know and trust, but not the only source for prediluted Rose and Melissa or the other essential oils listed here.)

It can take time to get to the other side of the initial shock and loss responses, and these gentle helpers will assist you on the way.

See you next time!